August 7, 2008 by veronica.

So it turns out that Dunkin Donuts is going to open stores in MN again. WAHOO!!! I can only hope they move pretty quickly, because I’m pretty sure heaven will be just like drinking a cup of their hazelnut coffee and eating an apple cinnamon donut.

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July 29, 2008 by veronica.

My Lamaze educator has the awesomest blog. This was the newest gem:
http://childbirtheducation.blogspot.com/2008/07/sleep-so-important-in-post-partum.html

Posted in Living la vida Lamaze | 1 Comment »

July 28, 2008 by veronica.

Our house has been on the market for almost 4 months now. The good news? We’ve had a ton of showings. The bad? No offers. Some feedback has been weird and random, some positive, and some very irritating (I mean, seriously, we can’t do a THING about our neighbor’s yard). We changed realtors, which has helped, but the fact of the matter remains our house is up for sale in one of the worst markets in years. What drives me crazy is that buyers want everything for no money. If you want a cheap house, there are some nice mold-infested messes all over town. Our house is NOT one of them, and yes, it is priced accordingly. Granted, we are looking at houses to buy, too, but we know there’s a huge difference in quality between a foreclosure (or even short sale) and a normal, hey, I need to sell for life reasons house. And yes, there’s a difference in price, but you can’t expect to screw everyone over.
So here we are, Chris still commuting a total of 4 hours a day, and my tummy getting ever-bigger. I hit 34 weeks this week (Or 35 weeks, depending on what dates you line up on the wheel of fun). And even though I have complete confidence going into this birth, there’s still something very unsettling about being home alone with a 2 1/2 year old for almost 13 hours a day with my husband a good 2 hour commute away. The ideal world would have been to move by now, but we had to pull the trigger and move to Plan B. That would be the plan where we move in with Chris’s parents in less than 2 weeks and wait for the baby (and, ostensibly, wait for the house to sell) there. The advantages to this plan are NUMEROUS– Chris will have a shorter commute, someone can help me reach things when I drop them on the floor, the house will always be clean for showings, I won’t be alone for the majority of the day, and on and on…. Sometimes it makes more sense than anything else that could have happened.

We are now spending our days slowly filling boxes. Packing isn’t so bad when you only fill 8 or 9 boxes at a time. We are running out of storage space in our unit, which I take as a sign of immense progress. I have a group of items all organized for when the baby comes. We went through all of Lily’s things and took out the items that were gender-neutral. We have gathered the bassinet, the sheets, and we purchased some clothes for the little guy to wear when he comes home for the first few weeks. Everything that we need right away is in the “Baby Now” tub. It’s all good.

One of the things that you miss out on 2nd (and I’m sure 3rd and 4th) children is the wonderful process of picking out every single item you want for your baby…although it’s kind of nice knowing most of that crap you’ll never need anyway. Yes, we had to pick out some clothes for this kid, but it’s not the same. Some things, though, I have taken large amounts of joy in. Like what, you ask? Well,
1) We spent a portion of the stimulus check on BumGenius 3.0 cloth diapers and cloth wipes. A lot of them. But hey, they’re made in the US, so that’s more stimulation to go around! Once Baby grows out of newborn diapers, we will hopefully have to spend little, if any, money on additional diapers.
2) Last week, after receiving my second invitation to the “Strong Moms” club, I called up the “lovely” Similac corporation and told them to remove me from their mailing list. Hell, I made it 27 months with Lily, I’ll be just fine, thank you! (Yeah, I was a closet nurser, but not so much now….I am VERY proud of us for making it that long!!!!) Here’s to upholding the WHO Code of Ethics!!!!
3) I got to buy a new diaper bag! We just bought it last night. Lily’s bag gave out years ago. We researched, comparison shopped, discussed, but finally ended up buying the closeout version of the Sherpani Lena. I get it on Friday and I’m very excited.
4) I feel great for being this far along. As of last week, I have only gained 21 pounds this whole pregnancy. It’s been a lot of work staying within the guidelines. I watch what I eat, I’ve been going to yoga classes since January, and if all else fails, my midwife gives me a good talking to about the ills of stress eating. This is all good. With Lily, I was always swollen, always had a hard time moving around, and felt like crap for the last 3 months. Now I just feel really pregnant, which means that I have my days if I don’t pace myself.

All in all, things are OK. They could be better, but they could be worse. Right now, we are looking at them just the way they are. Well, trying. And maybe some day we’ll be able to look back and this will all make sense, but right now we’re just going to move on the best we can.

Posted in Soapbox anyone?, Life, Raising baby | 1 Comment »

June 19, 2008 by veronica.

Two of the better things said to me today:
First, by a woman in my yoga class after finding out how far along I am ( I told her 6 months, but now I’m wondering if I’m 7):
“Oh, but you look so tiny!”

Then, by Chris, after I told him I was fed up with the medical system and was having the next baby at home:
“OK, well, I’ll get some books, read up on it, and stay at a Holiday Inn Express the night before and I’ll deliver the baby.”

Anything that gets me through the day…

Posted in Little boy in my belly | 1 Comment »

June 6, 2008 by veronica.

I realize this blog has very little to do with me, but I don’t care. This is important stuff.

So, the study kind of got lost in the hubub of a NYT article regarding some health insurance companies denying coverage (or charging more) for moms who have had Cesarean Births. But there was also a study that was just published that linked Cesareans with the increased risk of having a late preterm infant. Here’s the link.
Add another little “secret” to the consent forms for Cesareans, along with increased risk of maternal death, increased risk of infant death, increased chance of miscarriage in subsequent pregnancies, infection…and on and on….(and yes, I’m serious. Just do some homework. It’s all true.)

Posted in Living la vida Lamaze, Soapbox anyone?, Uncategorized | 1 Comment »

June 5, 2008 by veronica.

I’m not a big fan of the FDA. I think they approve too many things that are not safe to use. I don’t think drug companies can be trusted, either. Generally, and history proves this time and time again, they’ll hide bad information to get a drug approved. But when BOTH the FDA and a manufacturer warn against using a medication for a specific use, trust me, we should LISTEN.

And I say this because pretty much every care provider in a 15 mile radius will lie and say it’s safe. It’s not. It’s just really, really cheap, and so effective it literally squeezes unborn children (and the uteruses that house them) to death in more cases than anyone would care to admit. The drug? Cytotec. Want proof? Here and here.

There are safer alternatives, like prostaglandins (ideally in a method that can be removed if either mother or baby don’t tolerate the treatment), but they are more expensive, and less ahem effective. But seriously? I think it’s time hospitals stop lying to moms (or, actually, just not informing them) and move on to the next crazy birth medicine.

Posted in Living la vida Lamaze, Soapbox anyone? | 3 Comments »

May 26, 2008 by veronica.

After an almost 4 month-long hiatus from attending births, the last month has found me at 4 of them. They ranged from the very surreal (a dueling doula!) to absolutely awe-inspiring(Yay VBACs!!). And now, after months of refusing to pick up pregnancy books, I’ve found myself again consuming books about pregnancy and birth at an alarming rate.
With my daughter, I pored over books, trying to make sense of how things would go. “Wait, there are three stages? But one has three phases? What did they mean? And what the hell are these emotional signposts?” I knew it would be hard, but I had all the faith in the world in my resident OB. But very little faith in my own body. And, really, it was hard to have any faith in it, especially by the time my water broke. When that very-certain event happened, I had already experienced 3 “false alarms”. I was convinced my body couldn’t do it, but desperately tried to find some reassurance after each time that this was normal, and my body wasn’t broken. I wasn’t convinced, and I’m sure that’s part of the reason I had such a long, difficult birth. I was scared, my care providers kept reminding me that I should be scared, and I was certain my labor just wasn’t going to work out.
This time? This time I’m not wrapped up in my own pregnancy the way I was before; I’m more wrapped up in the subject of birth in general. Something sort of went off in me in the last few weeks and I’ve had this very intense need to work on….something. What I’m working on, I don’t know. But I know that I need to do a bunch of reading before I get a project figured out and I start to work on it. It may be an article for the professional journals I get. It may be something bigger. Again, I don’t know, but I know it’s growing, just as sure as this little boy in my stomach is growing, bit by bit every day.
So what about these “tigers”? Well, a “tiger”, according to Pam England, Author of Birthing From Within, are those fears women have about childbirth. She believes(and I strongly agree with her) that mothers have to face these fears so that they can has more positive birth experiences. Otherwise, these fears can cause all sorts of issues as they come out of the shadows for women.
After a meeting a few weeks ago, I was discussing a new study regarding childbirth that had been published. I’m a study nut. I really only believe in teaching evidence-based care, so that requires me to be up on the evidence. So we were talking about this study, which on the surface suggests one thing (that we can tell when women’s bodies are flawed and will need surgical help), but instead suggests something I know from other evidence( that it’s mostly a result of obstetric intervention). So we were discussing this study, and the doula asked me if knowing all of this stuff makes me nervous about my upcoming labor and birth.
My answer? Yes and No. I love knowing as much as I do. I love the fact that I have seen so many births have remarkable outcomes. I wish this wasn’t the case, but I know so much more than most American mothers know. In my case, I really truly believe that I can make informed decisions…mostly because I know ACOG and AWHONN guidelines, WHO targets, Cochrane database findings….All of that good stuff. All of that stuff that the “What to Fear”..errr…”Expect” books don’t tell you. (they make it sound like you can’t know anything…you’re not smart enough to understand any evidence, according to them!!!)
I do, however, have one very large tiger. I’m working very hard to confront him. My tiger? I’m am freaked out that I will have a care provider who refuses to listen to me, refuses to respect the process of birth, and who tries to control me through fear. I have seen this in so many labor rooms. I’m seen rude nurses who make up rules and facts as they go along, I’m seen midwives belittle the mother’s efforts, and I’ve seen OBs act without consent. It’s shocking and infuriating every time I see it happen, but I can’t ever do anything about it. I’m working very hard to ensure that I’ll have a respectful team around me once I do give birth again—There will be at least one doula, a midwife, a very informed husband, and hopefully a very skilled and sympathetic nurse. But at least this time, if I see a problem, I’ll be able to toss out anyone who does not treat this wonderful, awesome journey with the awe and respect it deserves.

Posted in Little boy in my belly, Living la vida Lamaze, The doula journey | 2 Comments »

March 24, 2008 by veronica.

I am in the midst of wading through what I now help many, many women wade through. Now that I am 4 months pregnant, it’s amazing how much easier things are not having to pick up books, wanting them to tell me the hundreds of things that could go wrong. I know what can happen. I know what to expect (without reading that terrible, awful book. Seriously? No educator recommends it!)and it’s been very nice navigating this pregnancy. I know few women take a refresher course (even though they should…just ask a mom who has), but I’m not because, well, I teach the darn thing!!!! However, there have been gut-wrenching choices to make. But yet I made them and I know it’s not based on fear that I’m sick or that I need someone to save me. It’s all very empowering. I do want to detail why i made the choices I have, and how I will continue to make those choices. I’m learning that pregnancy is just as much about growing a baby and growing in understanding and knowledge. I’ve got the basics down (again, because, hello, I teach them!!!), but I’m continually striving for more every day.

In the meantime, two things. Last weekend, I got together with some friends to watch Rikki Lake’s documentary, “The Business of Being Born”. You can rent it through Netflix right now. It’s excellent. I actually came away with a message one might not expect, but I will detail later. I just thought it was amazing to hear the OBs make some of their comments, but really, any one who seen many births knew that was the case. I just think it’s very thought-provoking.

Also, if you are so inclined, there was an article about Penny Simkin just written in Seattle. She’s the start of the doula movement, and many moms who have had kids would have gone through something Penny devised. You can fnd it here: http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/pacificnw/2004299467_pacificpenny23.html
Anyway. That’s it for now.

Posted in Living la vida Lamaze, The doula journey, Reviews | 2 Comments »

December 23, 2007 by veronica.

We hope this letter finds you doing well and enjoying the holidays.

We are preparing to start 2008 in no way connected to where we were a year ago.

Chris spent most of the year working as a contractor at IBM. He had been handling repairs and upgrades of servers and systems for their Websphere group. He had friends who worked in his area and enjoyed his coworkers. However, in November he accepted a position with US Bank in Minneapolis, and started there at the beginning of December. He is not enjoying the commute, but we hope to be able to move up soon and cut down his drive time. Fortunately, he really likes his job and the team he is now with.

I made many job changes this year. I just found out that a long year of studying and working had paid off, and I am now a Lamaze-certified childbirth instructor. In August, I found out I passed certification to become a certified doula, and way back in April I studied my little tail off and passed the Series 7 exam with flying colors. I think I am done studying for at least a few more months and may hold off on adding more letters after my name for at least awhile. I had been working as an assistant to a team of financial associates with Thrivent, but I felt so pulled by the doula and educator business, I decided to leave investments and pursue starting my own business and teaching my own classes. I worked full time at the day care I worked at back when Chris and I got married until October. However, plans always change, and I started teaching classes at Olmsted Medical Center in September. I am officially .2, but it’s a very flexible job with great coworkers. I just finished teaching my first childbirth series on my own, and I am looking to teaching and being a doula for many years to come!

We did have some setbacks this year, though. In August, our basement flooded (along with a good chunk of houses in SE MN), and we had to gut the entire thing. We came home late one night to water coming in under the oh-so-ugly paneling. Chris and I pulled carpet until 2:30 am, which helped, but there was still a lot to clean up once the rain stopped. We have been doing work on it every free moment we’ve got, and it will be so much better. Too bad we have to leave! We are hoping to finish it up before Mid-January so we can sell the house and get moving.

Lily has had a fantastic year! She has really blossomed into a very fun, intelligent kid. She loves drawing and coloring, and likes to play with all of her dolls and pretend to cook for us. We were able to take her to Disney World in November; she dragged 6 adults around the parks in her endless pursuit of Cinderella. Even when she came down with the croup, she was only sidelined for a day or so. We are already looking forward to planning our next vacation with her!

We have been blessed this year, and it is exciting to think what the new job changes will bring and where we will be living this time next year. Have a wonderful Christmas, and a happy New Year.

Love,
Chris, Veronica, and Lily Jacobsen

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December 15, 2007 by veronica.

My sister Anna is so cool. She will be spending Christmas in Colorado, but to make up for mot seeing us, she sent me a set of doctored pictures that she took from various places. I guess the inspiration is a website called icanhascheezburger.com. So I’ll just put her renditions up. Enjoy!

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